...and that's my saving grace

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

live with no regrets?

I've always hated that question: What's one thing you've done that you regret. Everytime someone asks that question...honestly a million thoughts come to mind! Of course you've always got the one tool that says, "Well I don't have any regrets because I don't think that's the way you should live your life without regreting anything....blah blah blah." barf. Everyone has regrets and I don't believe that is anything to be ashamed of.
This isn't as random as you think. It actually sprouted from another question I had with a friend. But during this discussion with my friend...I figured out the one thing I regret most in life. It's not so much as a regret...as a missed memory.
The thing I regret the most...is that I don't remember my dad. I remember vaguely how he smelled...but I have no idea what his voice sounded like. I can't remember the last conversation we had. I can't remember the last car he owned. I can't remember the last movie we watched together. I can't remember the last time I saw him..normally. I can't remember the last Christmas we had. I can't remember the last birthday present he got me. I can't remember. It eats at me everyday that such valuable memories of my childhood are gone. I can never bring those back. never. not even close.
Guys you have to cherrish your parents. I love my mom more than anything..and I thank God everyday that I have such an amazing mom who has done so much for me and shelb. But at the same time...there will always be that void. I know your thinking that this is just a divorced family kid rant...but it's so much more than that. This is different. Remember the little things...because they mean more to you than you know...until they are gone.

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